Happy Anniversary

Today is February 25th 2015. It`s been one year (+ a day) since I was released from the hospital. So it has been a year since I have last been hospitalized. It`s been exactly one year since I was fired from my job, being told to `get my shit together', which catapulted into us having to foreclose on the house and move.

In one year I have moved twice.

In one year I have had 5 different jobs. A cleaner, two coffee shops, a transfer attendant, and now a wholesale accounts manager.

In one year I have gone through numerous ups and downs. Near hospitalizations, crisis', ECT, new drugs, and some self help steps.

I, personally, and my family have come a long way in one year.

We are in a place that we absolutely love. The land we are on is gorgeous, and I can't believe we get to live on it. The house itself is perfect for us, and just has so many quirks and charms - though the wasps nest in our wall is free to go any time it wants to!

I am working at a place where I actually feel valued and where I am doing a good job. Also, going through all those jobs this past year led me to what my passion is and what I want to make a career out of.

I still harbour feelings over the job I was fired from, and I need to deal with those. I still have many fears and anxieties that the depression that I have overcome will come roaring back at a moment's notice. I still deal with many issues of being borderline and bipolar - but I'm here - and thriving.

I leave for my 10 day vipassana meditation course next week. I have been looking forward to doing that for months now. I am trying to get into running and not hating myself when I don't or can't run for whatever reason. I would like to get back into Bikram yoga. I would also like to find some hobbies. I need some skills to deal with my extreme emotions, but I know that now - which is a step in the right direction.

My kids are growing, and our family is changing. We are realizing what is working for us in terms of schooling and education - rather than just surviving because that's all we have the energy for. We are picking our financial selves up and working towards the future.

Things are not perfect. But so many things are better than they were a year ago.

I survived the last year - and for that, I am happy.